How To Jump Safely From A Moving Matatu

I have put this one here because if you do it wrong, you can very easily die.

Safety first: look out for the following things when you make the decision to jump out of the matatu (or other vehicle). The list is just a list. There is no order of precedence here. If you fail to do one thing on this list, your chances of dying increase by 100%.

1. Be sure you want to jump. If you are double-minded about it, you are likely to execute it poorly and thus, die. Easy.
2. Be aware of your surroundings. This means the vehicle you are in, the type, model, the people you are with, how the driver is executing his job, the speed of the vehicle, places to hold and places to place your feet.
3. Know your body. If you are broken, fat, unfit or old, your chances of failure are very high.
4. Are you carrying something? If you are, it might distract you, get caught in something and drag you (under/alongside/behind the car) or break something in your body if it is too heavy. If a child, they can also get killed or very badly hurt though children's bodies are generally relaxed.
5. Understand the road you intend to jump at. The ideal would be smooth, level tarmac with your driver driving at about thirty kilometres per hour, and thick grass by the roadside but conditions differ. You might have to jump onto a road with potholes or near a river or sugarcane plantation. Look at the road first and do not be stupid. You will need space to execute this. If you jump near a curb with metal poles for example, you are likely to lose a nut or kidney.
6. Know how the driver is driving. He could be speeding but steady or slow but driving like he does not know what he is doing. He could be swerving or driving too close to other vehicles. At the end of the day, you might need to communicate with him so he facilitates your jumping, unless you are in an emergency like Trevor Noah and his mother.
7. Watch out for other motorists. People are crazy. You might jump and land on a motorcycle rider who suddenly decided to overlap or jump into a stationary truck. Sometimes there are animals like cows and goats, so make sure the road is clear.
8. This one is a combination of points two and six: Consider the loading of the matatu, that is, the placement of luggage and people and whether it is overloaded. If it is overloaded and the driver is unfamiliar with the vehicle or route or high or careless or suddenly responds to an emergency, the vehicle might decide to fall. If it falls on the side you intend to jump out of and happens to find your body there, it might cut you in half. This actually happened to someone on Ngong' Road this year. This also applies if you are just nyonyolearing the car.

Jumping off the vehicle requires some mathematics and physics. You will need to think about the speed of the vehicle, your height from and alignment to the ground , your body, your foorwear and your intended landing style.

When you jump off the vehicle, you will move at the same speed as the vehicle, so you need to make sure you do not land stiffly as if you were just jumping from a stool to the ground. Be flexible, relaxed and in motion.

Use the foot opposite to the vehicle to touch the ground first and RUN! Preferably away from the vehicle.

If you feel yourself falling towards the vehicle, you can push yourself away from it but keep running until you lose enough momentum to stop.

Alternatively, you can jump with both feet but be sure to bounce off the road or run immediately you touch it. This technique is harder to execute because it requires a high level of communication between your brain and muscles, so be stingy with it if you are not in shape.

Finally,

and this is very important: do not overthink this. Use your eyes and head, be calm, get the right moment and execute. Your brain automatically makes calculations regarding your body's motion and a million other things I am not willing to start listing here. You can list them yourself, though. The previous sentence is not homework.

Notes

Doing this for long enough and at high enough speeds may damage your knees or heels, so be fit, use proper shoes where possible and also use proper technique.

For your own sake, be very alert. A small thing can ruin a big day, like a driver speeding up just when you are executing the jump. This has also happened somewhere.